Yes, Stewart Smalley, aka Al Franken, was finally elected to the U.S. Senate! After a feeble and degrading challenge to his election by “I’m not really a Jew” Norm Coleman, Stewart can now set his sights on Capital Hill. His first order of business will be to meet with each senator privately to discuss their lack of self esteem. “The first law I would like to pass is entitled “The Bi-Partisan Group Hug Act” which will require all in congress to hug each other before and after each session. Belive me, they all need a hug and after this election, I do too!
All articles in category: "Al Franken,comedy,news,politics,Stewart Smalley"
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Stewart Smalley to Save Senate!
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Ya Gotta Love This…
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Sweet Dreams Captain EO
Never forgotten…
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Snow White Directors Cut to be Released
Disney announced today that they will release a new the directors cut version of the classic animated film Snow White. This movie will contain recently discovered footage of what life was like for Snow a few years after marrying Prince Charming. Also discovered was footage for an alternate ending where Snow moves in with the Dwarfs. The studio decide against including it in this release because it made her look like a whore.
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How to Stay Warm
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Put a Step back in your Life
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Lame-ass Indiana Congressman Proposes Plexi-glass Cage for Public Visitors
In an effort to continue the fear mongering started during the Bush administration, Indiana republican congressman Dan Burton today proposed enclosing the Capitol gallery in Plexiglas to protect members of Congress from a terrorist attack.“What this bill does is it would authorize a study to look at enclosing the chamber, the gallery chamber, with Plexiglas so that somebody can’t throw a bomb down on the floor and kill a lot of us,” Burton told the Rules Committee Thursday. To the shock of on-looking congressmembers, Burton described how a terrorist could kill the lot of them. Someone could kill “half the Members of Congress right now,” he said.
“You could take a detonating device that looks like a watch so you could get through the metal detector,” Burton explained. “And when everybody was on the floor, as many as you wanted, you could put that into the plastic explosive, toss it out on the floor, and there is no way you would lose half of us if we were on the floor, at least, or more. I don’t know how much damage it would do.”
It has now become obvious to those with half a brain that congressman Burton has shit for brains.
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My New Bodyguard
Don’t mess with her… She has a fast trigger!
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O.K. I’m a Fan
Amanda Bynes
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Bachelor Dinner
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My Airline Had to “Re-Boot” it’s Airplane Today
So we are all sitting on the tarmac on Maui after the mule pushed us away from the gate awaiting the short flight to Honolulu. But why aren’t we going anywhere? We’re just sitting. Five minutes become ten minutes and not a word from the cockpit. Then we saw several fire trucks come across the field. “It looks like they are heading our way!” WTF! Is the plane on fire? Should we get ready to evacuate? Then they drove right past us to the other end of the airport. Whew! They were only on a training exercise.
So now the pilot comes on the PA. “Sorry folks but our computer has a glitch and we need to re-boot the plane.” Re-boot the plane? Now that is a first for me. He continued, “we will have to shut down all the systems and re-start them in sequence.” “It should only take ten minutes and then we will be off to Honolulu.”
Sure enough that’s what they did. The engines went off, the AC shout down and it got real quiet. Then things started to hum and blow again and our Mokulele Airlines Embraer “E-jet” flight MW203 was off! I gotta admit the plane is new and very cool. Since it uses fly-by-wire technology it makes sense that they needed to re-boot it. My only hope is that they never have to re-boot in the air!
I wonder, do they still call it a “Cockpit” if there is a lady pilot?
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The World Needs More Tongue..
OMG.. it reaches her chin!
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This Dude is Bad Too!
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Where Do You Tattoo?
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Are Bush Appointees Sabotaging Obama’s Recovery Plan?
Something is becoming more and more apparent to me. The implementation of the stimulus plan is being disabled by former president Bush appointees still within the federal bureaucracy. They are doing it with a prodigious amount of red tape and delay tactics to keep these much needed funds out of the economy.
This effort has one goal, to discredit Obama’s stimulus program by forcing local economies into a sharper decline. Unless this stonewalling by Bush appointees is stopped, our economy will just get worse. We have to remove ALL Bush appointees and their second-level cronies from office NOW.
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Magic Scarf Trick
David Blaine, eat your heart out..
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Sometimes I Feel Like This…
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That’s One Lucky Dog!
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What I Like About You…
Is that you like milk too!
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This Dude is Bad!
Here’s a shot of 56 year old Mickey Rourke as Whiplash from Iron Man 2 filming.
